Dear …,
I still remember that 1st day when you started riding with us. It was July 14th, the first Monday I returned with W after “winter” vacation. When I got on the car, I immediately froze - who was that (very cute) guy sitting there? But, as usual, I ignored it, cause I’m just too shy and I NEVER strike up conversations with people I haven’t met. So I just went on talking to J like no one was there, but secretly hoping that you would jump into the conversation and introduce yourself. That’s why I was so happy when J talked to you, it gave me an excuse to talk to you too. And I still remember the conversation we had, you showed us your id from Canada, and I showed my school id from when I went to school in Michigan. You told us you were afraid of needles and I thought that was incredibly cute. I made an effort to memorize your (kinda funny) name, so I could look it up on Orkut later. And thank God I found you right away, or else I would have gone crazy. haha. The very next day I had already told people about the cute new guy.
The second time I saw you, there were only 3 of us(plus W, the driver!) in the car and I was too shy to start the conversation(what’s new?!), so I kept on listening to my iPod (and embarrassing enough, mouthing the words too!). Then they got out the car and you started talking to me, needless to say, those 10 minutes (including you answering your phone) made me very happy. When I got home my dad asked me why did I have such a big smile on my face… this would happen every Monday I saw you from then on. That’s actually one of the things I love most about you. You’re such an easy person to talk to, we can talk a lot about everything, despite my shyness.
Then one day you didn’t show up. I took the courage to add you on orkut. That was probably the bravest thing I have ever done! haha. You sent me a comment back and I was in heaven. We would always talk on Mondays and sometimes exchange comments on orkut. You were always the highlight of my week. It felt great to like someone again, even if I don’t know if you feel the same way about me.
On saturdays we would see each other occasionally, but I was terrified to talk to you like we normally do. It seems dumb now, but I think I felt intimidated by all those people I didn’t know. But I still kept things going, always sending you comments at random days. And you’d always respond really nicely to me. The only thing that really bothers me is that I am the one who always sends the first comment and the last one too. I just wish that sometimes you’d send me one unexpectedly.
Time flew by and before I knew it, it was November. That would be the last time I talked to you in person. By then, we’d already become friends. And been through some good times together. Like when you were telling ghost stories to B; when I said the car flew at that one bump and I could tell you were a little mad; the time when you spoke German and asked me what German words I knew, I said “I love you” and together we said “Ich liebe dich”; then later that day I spoke a little French(even though it’s one of the things I’m most shy about); you telling me about your “family” back in Canada; me telling you about my first sip of alcohol and the adventures of getting my (still unused) fake id.
In December, against your will, they shaved you head(as it’s customary for boys who get into college) and thank God I didn’t see you cause J told me you looked ugly! haha. But I saw your picture on J. A’s album and it wasn’t that bad! haha. I think you always look cute, no matter what. Another thing I always loved about you is how supportive you were (when I told you I flunked in not 1, not 2, but in 3 subjects!) and how adorable you look when you’re angry (like that time when you had no keys and couldn’t get inside your house).
Then summer vacation started and we didn’t talk until the day, that by fate, I saw you in your car while I was riding the bus for the first time. We got on talking via comments on orkut and you were sweet as always. In February there was the “Summer Festival” you told me you liked(back in that 2nd day conversation) and I was going for the first time in my life. I didn’t get a chance to ask if you were going and if so which day(I only went on Friday), but I was hoping we’d bump into each other there. Much to my chagrin, that didn’t happen. Carnaval rolled by and (even though it was a few days late) I took the courage to ask you how yours went. In the process, I managed to artfully arrange to give you my msn so we’d finally talk more often.
Still, everytime I talked to you it’d be heaven. And as usual, I started all of our msn convos. By now, all my friends knew about you. They had even given you a cute nickname - The Laws. Even my friend D.S. who is good friends with your friend G. B. had a plan going so we could go to the same concert(Forro do Reino) and bump into each other there(as pure coincidence! haha). Unfortunately it didn’t happen cause you said you were tired of seeing the main band(and hopefully had no clue about our little plan).
I’m still hoping we’ll see each other soon. It’s been almost 6 months since I last saw you in person. And I can’t help it if I still like you… a lot. I think the song “Hey Stephen” by Taylor Swift should change to “Hey N” cause it fits you perfectly. We’ve known each other for a long time now and I’m still waiting for you to ask me out(just do it already!). I don’t know if I give enough hints(in my mind, I think I’m very obvious, but I’ve never done this for anyone else, so maybe I should step it up a little?!). But I guess guys are sometimes a little too oblivious to things like that, right?
I just want you to know that all those love quotes and the 50 reasons that were on my profile(I know you saw them!) were all ment for you. All those 11:11 wishes were ment for you too. And I’ll keep starting conversations on msn until you get tired of me and I win by exhaustion. haha. I guess we’ll just see where this gets us! ;D
Love,
Carol ♥
